‘My scar is called adoption’: The lived experiences of Irish mothers who have lost a child through closed adoption

Previous research has continuously identified a need for comprehensive model of working with first mothers in adoption. This gap knowledge hindered the development services, to detriment quality life and well-being this group. study seeks remedy deficiency by exploring lived experiences Irish who have lost child through closed It aims expand understanding impact such loss, particular how it affects their journey reconnection reunion adulthood. Semi-structured interviews were undertaken six women from Ireland had way narratives analysed using Interpretative Phenomenological Analysis (IPA). Two superordinate themes emerged data: ‘Motherhood concealed: loss autonomy connection’ revealed: pathway towards reconnection’. Within each theme, two subordinate ones identified: ‘Dehumanised, disempowered dismissed’, ‘Coping disconnection’, ‘Breaking silence’ ‘Reunion The these encapsulate personal connectedness resulting participants coped it. others describe participants’ growth agency process breaking silence concealed motherhood reunification now adult children. findings indicate that engaging therapeutic services and/or adoption peer support enables express feelings grief move coping strategies dominated disconnection marked autonomous processing emotion new patterns. children plays significant role transition.